What do psychology, reading, and water consumption have in common?
"I had to trick my body into drinking more water"
Are you one of those people that just naturally loves water, guzzling it all day and night? Or maybe you find it easy to drink only with lots of ice, lemon, or a straw. According to a recent study conducted by Quench, 77% of those surveyed believed themselves to be at least mildly dehydrated on a daily basis. Are you one of these poor, unfortunate souls? If so, join the club. It is with great shame that I admit that I have spent most of my life improperly hydrated due to the fact that I absolutely detest the flavor of water. I know, I know, “water doesn’t even have a taste”. That is objectively incorrect, and I hate the taste so much that I have gagged while drinking water, on a number of occasions. But this is my success story. I am going to let you in on my little secret for getting into that 33% and becoming the well-hydrated person that I was always meant to be.
The year was 2015, the location was the University of Michigan. I was at a lecture by one of my all-time favorite professors, Brian Malley, a no-nonsense psychology instructor known for his stolid demeanor and razor-sharp wit. On this particular evening in Psych 111: Psychology as a Natural Science, Professor Malley was teaching us about conditioning. Most are familiar with Pavlov’s dog’s drooling situation brought about by classical conditioning, but I was more interested in operant conditioning. Operant conditioning is the process of learning (or un-learning) a behavior through a system of rewards or punishments. On that fateful day, he gave us an assignment: to condition ourselves. Initially frustrated, as he wasn’t really one to dole out menial busy work, I dismissed this as a waste of my time. But when he said that he wanted us to condition ourselves to either learn or un-learn a habit that would ultimately benefit us and that he was only interested in us actually using this to better ourselves, I trusted that son-of-a-gun and I knew what I had to do.
I had to trick my body into drinking more water.
Now, of course, acting as both experimenter and subject only allows for so much trickery, but I like to think that I pulled it off. The parameters were as follows: we had to undergo conditioning for two weeks, as that’s how long Malley said it takes the average person to adopt a new behavior, we had to choose something with measurable results, we had to record our results each day, and we had to do something that actually mattered to us. Since there are few things as important as your health, I knew that my chosen undertaking was noble. We could choose either classical or operant conditioning, using either rewards or punishments. I went with rewards, obviously, because I don’t hate myself. As the incredibly bookish person that I am, it didn’t take long to decide that the reward at the end of those two weeks would be a novel. I’d had my sights set on Fates and Furies by Lauren Groff for quite some time (highly recommend), and this was the perfect time to splurge on a shiny, new hardcover (now I’m drooling…).
After the lecture that day, I left feeling almost as good as I would have if I were properly hydrated. I would record my water intake (a disgusting 84 ounces a day) by assessing my progress toward the aforementioned daily goal, and each day that I met the goal would earn me a small, pre-determined portion of the cost of the book (I already had the money, but I’m not one to spend without purpose). I had a little chart and everything. For the first few days, most of those ounces were consumed in an end-of-the-day chug (do not recommend) that can be compared to a marathoner’s final push through the finish and which, like that marathon, also resulted in nausea and regret (again, do not recommend). I was not yet feeling the positive effects of hydration -- I was quite possibly hating water more than ever.
Then something amazing happened.
After about five days, water started tasting less the way sadness feels, and more like the life-giving beverage that it is. My body thanked me for doing the bare minimum of self care. My energy was up, my skin was clear, and my daily headaches were no longer. Each time my taste buds betrayed me and reminded me of how foul water tastes, I simply looked at my chart and thought about the novel that would be in my hands in no time and reminded myself that I was an adult woman who really should be able to drink water, I mean come on. In fierce competition with myself and in an effort to make it up to my 19-years-parched organs, I started drinking even more water. Take that, me, I would think while wiping away tears from the hurtful words.
I’m sure you’ve already guessed how this ended. I succeeded each day, I got the book, I got an A on the assignment, and I walked away with the best gift I’ve ever given myself: the gift of being able to drink water without shivering. Yes, today I drink more than enough. I pride myself on my hydration to anyone that will listen and spend a lot of time urinating. Professor Malley, if you’re reading this, thank you for that assignment and for those times you let us leave class really early. Fellow water-haters, if you are reading this, please consider conditioning yourself, as I did, to stay hydrated. There is no undertaking more worthy than to live a healthy life, and I feel better than ever.
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